The husband of a co-worker is in the hospital "living" his last few hours. He has been asleep since 3pm yesterday. Cancer. You might say that Cancer has taken his life, but that wouldn't be exactly true. Cancer is the "how". Cancer is a horrible thing. In my opinion the worst way to die (except for torture). This man has suffered through months of chemotherapy, knowing that the end would come painfully. I praise God that my mother's end came swiftly and, from what I understand, with little pain.
My mother slipped into a deep sleep after her ambulance ride to the Hospice facility. It was a little more than 48 hours later when she died. No one had any idea how close to dying she was. But there you have it...we are all so much more the wiser now. My dad wishes that he had ridden with her to Hospice, that maybe it would have made a difference. I encourage him not to have those thoughts, as they will make him crazy. I think, even if he had ridden with her, he would still be dealing with guilt about something else. The fact is plain...God determines our every breath, He determines the "how" of our last breath. Accepting that will help ease the pain...both the physical pain and the emotional pain, not just for the one who is dying, but also for the one watching. I know, easy for me to say - no it isn't. I am still, at times - seven months later - in denial. I look at her picture and can't believe it is true. How my heart breaks for this woman...watching her husband die. How will she go on? How do any of us go on?
But by the grace of God.
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